When You Least Expect It - Expect It

At the end of this past August, I found out that I have a tumor on my brain. This is good news...And I'll explain why.

A) It's good news because it's most likely non-cancerous.
B) It's good news because if we hadn't found it now, it could have begun attaching itself to my brain, or tunnelling into the vain it's attached to. Which makes things a lot more complicated when it comes to surgery.
3) Well, that's actually all the good reasons I can think of - but two is a start.

I have only told a handful of people, because it's stressful to talk about, and for the last two months I have actually known very little about my tumor, myself.

Oh yeah - I thought of another "good news" thing: c) It's pretty small.

So, as I was saying, I haven't told all that many people. I figure that now is the time for this "NEWS RELEASE" - as catching people off-guard with, "By the way...I'm having brain surgery next week" just wouldn't be cool.

It's too much work to try to explain the details and respond to every email I might get - so writing this blog will be my primary means of communication regarding this issue, over the next couple of months.

How has this impacted my life? Well, I've been depressed some days. Scared, others. Anxious. I'm not looking forward to being couch-bound for several days and in the hospital one or two. I guess - no, I know - it could be worse. Doc says I should be back to work full time in a month from the date of my surgery...Dec. 18th.

I tried on wigs yesterday. Since the tumor is on the top-middle of my brain, I can't see that being a good look just having a three-inch section shaved and the rest, well, not. SO, since I can choose whatever look I like - I think I'll go for the Marilyn Monroe or the Pat Benatar. It's such a hard decision! My vanity says: Girl, you are going to be one UGLY, martian-looking bald woman. And then my inner-bitch says: Who the hell cares??? As long as I make it through this without any hitches, I'll be happy - no matter how awkward I may look.

So, I'll post up until surgery - probably once a week or so - and then after I'm out or the hospital and feel up to doing anything.

Send peaceful thoughts my way.
Love,
Deborah