In Stitches

I'm not so clever as to know the origins of the saying, "in stiches." I know that this refers to laughing heartily. I also know that if you have recently had surgery (requiring stitches) and someone makes you laugh, that you will be both - laughing and in stitches.

Once, when my brother David had his appendix out, and my brother Joel and I visited him in the hospital, we did everything we could to make him laugh - because there was something terribly funny about watching him try not to laugh in order to not burst his new stitches. We were awful. I know this now. I still find it funny.

Since having my own surgery - requiring who knows how many stitches - I have not found laughing such a miserable fate; I rather embrace it. That said, in the first several days after surgery I found things such as sneezing and puking pretty undesirable past-times.

Two days ago, much recovered I find myself, and still in stitches.

My head, at the surgery site, still hurts. It is quite tender. It feels as if there is a handful of tiny hair nymphs which have set to pulling the hair at the crown of my head in all manor, and all time, of day. I assume that this is the tightening of the sutures as they heal. I also assume that there are really not nymphs atop my head, but it's a fun visual, none-the-less.

To awaken to a ceiling full of stick-bugs, you do not need stitches at all to find yourself in stitches. You need only to look up and feel the full weight of at least twenty or thirty bugs register on that part of you that triggers disbelief and laughter all in the same instance. You need only do this at 8:00 in the morning before you've had your tea, before God is awake, before your son is off to middle school, before you are due at your own place of employment in less than an hour.

Yes, we have stick-bugs. We have let them populate at grandiose proportions. Apparently they can do this whether or not Mr. and Mrs. Stick bug get together or not. Noah and his Ark would only have needed to bring one stick bug on board.

This was not my idea...But you do what you do for those you love - and those I love happen to like stick bugs. Craigslist is like free candy on the counter of some business you solicit. Yes, sometimes you actually pay for things you get on Craigslist. Sometimes you get things for free and pay for them...later.

When you pull over, in the dark, on a Thursday night, to whack away at a deteriorating blackberry bush, you are paying. When you sneak to the end of your street, and make sure your neighbors aren't around so you can swipe some of their coveted ivy - you are paying. When you have to bust out your step ladder at 8:00 in the morning, you are paying. If I had been paid - to date - for all the stick bugs I have plucked off of ceilings, blinds, counters, turtle backs, plants and almost any other surface you can imagine - I'd be well-to-do.

In hindsight, it was my fault for the last large round of stick bugs I had to herd up. I left the lid off the stick bug terrarium...After meeting with some people that we had somehow convinced to come over to our home and take some of our stick bugs from us. For FREE. On, of course, Craigslist. What comes around...

So, I am taking life in stride. I am recovering while my stitches disintegrate. I have lived through the non-mundane and mundane. Dare I suggest that I am inspired by something as humble as an insect? I mean, stick bugs are sturdy. They blend into their environment. They have a surprisingly strong grip (just try to pry one off a wall or ceiling).

So, am I inspired by our bugs? Hell no. But, I have to laugh. I can't believe that I've survived brain surgery, and what I return to are things like tracking down food for a bug that resembles a twig. And sometimes I laugh so hard - that yes, I am, in stitches.

And this is a good thing.

Now, off to bed.